So as per my Tumblr, I had no plans on updating tonight.  I have been organizing my computer and my apartment and putting ads on the website and watching Friday Night Lights for some reason.  Because of these mostly productive things I didn’t really have any time to work on a good update for you this weekend.  I mean who the hell updates on the weekend anyway?  Well, I guess I do…

While I was organizing my old hard drives I found a bunch of cool shit including some funny old photos I will be Tumbling next week, some old pictures I took of Lady Gaga in 2007, and this video of me getting my lip pierced.

I got my lip done in 2001 when I was living in Richmond, VA.  Actually now that I think about it, it might have been early 2002, but that is completely not important.  I had the lip ring up until about two years ago when I was at Happy Endings and this drunk model chick punched me in the face for taking her photo.  She was my friends roommate too.  It was really insane, but I guess that’s what happens when you hang out with drunk people every single night.  Anyway, when she punched me the ball from my lip ring popped out and a few days later I lost the lip ring while eating a bagel on the Subway.  I thought about getting a new ring, but I decided that I was way to old to have facial piercings so I took it out.

Anyway, the video is sort of graphic, and very very mildly entertaining.  But if you had the time to read this boring fucking post, you have the time to watch this short and painful video.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAlaVuXsfqA[/youtube]

I am taking the day to enjoy the fact that I don’t have any photos I need to get up today. It is really quite wonderful to have the burden of a million pictures waiting to go up. I do have a few things I could post, but I think I’ll hold off on them until next week. I am shooting tonight so there will be pictures tomorrow, but today I am going to take a little break and possibly put some more Ikea furniture together. My kitchen office is almost complete. I just need to build a desk and a book shelf and two mini DVD shelves that sort of attach to the bookshelf. It’s all pretty exciting to me and extremely boring to you, so instead I will leave you with three exciting music videos… with Muppets!

Oh, and just for the record, if I could dance like Leo Sayer my life would be complete.

Ps. Did you know muppet is recognized by my spell check but not muppets? Shenanigans.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyreul5Cvsw[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nA2UF1xwGP4[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JruqUIjl5Sw[/youtube]

Easily the worst part about running a website for a living is having to figure out new widgets and aps and plugins and all this other bullshit that makes more people come to your page.  You see, I want people to come to this page. It makes me happy, and soon it will make me money, but getting people here is always annoying. Don’t get me wrong, a lot of people come here without me having to do anything but post quality content, but several hundred people a day come in from Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook, so I have to be on top of all that shit.  I try to make my Twitter as funny and interesting as can be, I try to post interesting content to my Tumblr and I used to have it set up on Facebook so that all my blog updates would show up there, but now that doesn’t work anymore.  I am trying to get that fixed but in the mean time I need to make sure I am on top of other bullshit.

Number one on that list of new bullshit, is the Facebook like buttons.  I don’t know why people have so much need to like things and give thumbs up to things or whatever the kids are doing these days, but putting the Like buttons on your page seems to more than double Facebook traffic, so guess what? I have a fucking like button at the bottom of each post and you guys need to be fucking pressing it.  Now and often. Maybe not this post so much, but older posts you like, and new posts you will like in the future.  That would help me out, and show all your Facebook buddies how rad you are.

Also if you use Stumbl or Digg or any of that crap, I updated that plug in so all those buttons at the bottom of each post are once again working properly.  You should Digg my Sumbls asap. Or Rededit, or whatever.  I don’t know…

Lastly when I was looking for plug ins, I came across a bunch of weird, ugly and ineffective bullshit. One that seems to be just weird and ugly is the Meebo tool bar.  It is at the bottom of my page now (unless you use one of the several browsers it doesn’t work on). With this bar you can use all sorts of instant messaging programs directly from my website. It’s pretty cool because now you can use AIM from here instead of having to be logged in or whatever.  I don’t know.  The real reason I like it is because you can now drag and drop photos into social networking sites really easily.  And you can still copy pictures but you have to right click to save as now instead of dragging and dropping, at least from the main page.

Now, given all that, the Meebo plug in is really fucking ugly, and could possibly be really annoying.  So please give me some feedback about that. If the thing is driving you nuts let me know, but if you are digging it, let me know that too.  I need to make some decisions on it soon.

And lastly, and I am sure I will mention this again in a future post, I started a Facebook fan page. Pretty soon all of you who follow me on Facebook will get one of those annoying “Igor is a fan of Igor and wants you to be a fan of Igor too” emails that I get 400 times a day and make me want to stab people.  I have a Facebook group, but my web guy tells me that is not good enough now, and that Fan Pages are the new thing and I need that. So sure, whatever. Let’s see what that does before I even spend another 15 seconds even thinking about it. I have already spent my entire afternoon dealing with this madness. Just look at it and tell me what you think.

Now, to apologize to you for reading this necessary but boring fucking post, here is the new Purple Crush video. I love these kids and the video is pretty funny and I am sure if I could even hear music anymore I am sure I would like the sound of it. Too bad my brain has turned off any ability to enjoy sounds.

PS. I perhaps might be slightly stressed out that I am turning 30 in two weeks. Sorry.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp4-wNlPYUY[/youtube]

Here is some more madness from the NFL Draft.

While I was waiting in line I heard some chants of “Fuck Tom Brady”.  I turned to see who people were shouting at and it was some asshole holding a mic wearing a hideous Tom Bundchen Brady throwback jersey. As I began to shout obscenities at both him and the Jets fans he was talking to I realized it was none other than comedian Nick Stevens a guy who I vaguely knew years ago when I was hanging out in the NYC comedy scene.  I at once started chanting “Fuck Nick Stevens” but for some reason the chant didn’t really catch on.

Nick was interviewing people as Paul “Fitzy” Fitzgerald, an asshole Boston sports fan (ed note: redundant).  It’s pretty much a given that the only thing worse than a Philly sports fan is a Boston sports fan and Nick plays the heel well.  I mean seriously, the Patriots were garbage for thity fucking years and all of a sudden everyone in Boston acts like they are life long die hard Pats fans.  Where the fuck were you guys when Marino was embarassing all of New England touchdown by touchdown? And don’t get me fucking started on those low life Red Sox fans… Honestly I don’t give a shit about basketball but I route against the Celtics just because I know when they lose another douche bag Pats/Sox homer is crying himself to sleep somewhere north of NYC. Fuck you all.

Oh, sorry, I was on a tiny tangent.  Fitzy is actually a pretty fucking funny dude, and is well aware of the contempt the rest of NFL fans have for him and his ilk. I hope after the Caps win a few Stanley Cups I can feel the same wrath on the way to MSG to watch Ovechkin make Sean Avery cry orange and blue tears.

Shit, again, off on a tangent.  Just watch this video, it’s really funny if you like football, and if not, you can just watch me dressed up like a skinny jeans wearing jock making a fool of my self.  I show up in the background a few times, but I have speaking rolls around 2:35 and again at 3:24. Enjoy.

PS. Fuck the Bruins too.  Just sayin’.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udBXVIPYiUo[/youtube]

As far as updating my website goes this week has been a disaster.  I have been crazy busy doing day time stuff and not getting enough done at night.  I am headed to the NFL Draft right now and I thought I was going to get to update my website before I left but my internet has been out for the last two hours and now that it is finally working I have to leave.  I have so much shit to get you guys and I just wanted to let you know I still love you.  I have some SXSW ready to go and some photos from a lovley garden party, plus three sets of naked girls.  I mean, so much good stuff, but things just keep getting in my way.  I am going to be putting previews up on my Tumblr so check that in the mean time.  Have a video for your time, see you ASAP. Xo.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEtw3XJoJrE[/youtube]

So I just wanted to address an Insane Clown Posse video that just came out for their song Miracles. It seems that Twitter is a buzz mocking what might easily be one of the worst videos of all time. The combination of horrible production values with some of the dumbest lyrics ever written are impressive but I think what is making this video so much fun to mock is that this video about the wonders of creation is written by a band who has made a career out of making violent rednecks more violent.

So first, let me tell you a secret.  I was once a Juggalo.  When I was in high school I met this girl named Shanna. She was the first person I ever kissed and I was pretty much in love with her and eventually lost my best friend over her. Losing my best friend in that way is the biggest regret in my life, but the biggest musical regret in my life was being an ICP fan.  I can thank Shanna for that too.  She loved ICP and somehow, despite the fact that I only listened to punk rock and rockabilly my entire high school career she got me into the Carnival.  I was a fucking jugglao. I went to at least 3 ICP shows in face paint. I even used to tag WICKED CLOWNS when I did bullshit like that. To this day I still like their third album a lot.  I like it in the way you might like a cheesy horror film (Killer Klowns From Outer Space for example…) but I still like it.  So when I mock of ICP, let it be known that it comes from the heart.

Now the video speaks for itself. You just need to watch it:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-agl0pOQfs[/youtube]

DJ Jubilee described the video as “The Rainbow Connection with curse words.” Nuff said.  It’s frankly too easy to make fun of. No need.  What I wanted to tell you guys about is the fact that ICP have been a Christian rap group for some time. Seriously. Christian Rap.

ICP built a mythology around murdering and clowns and fucking fat bitches that some how centers around Christian theology.  ICP’s entire catalogue is basically a horrible modern version of Martin Luther’s 95 Theses only somehow less confrontational.  ICP seem pretty inclusive they pitch a big tent as long as you are willing to spend your tithing on clown action figures and ICP wrestling DVDs.  Amazingly They spent 5.9 albums preaching about murdering people before on the last song on their supposed last album they broke the news that all along they were all about the G-O-D.  More impressive is that somehow even after the big reveal they managed to keep their fan base mostly intact. What kinda ICP fan would just accept that their favorite band is now all about Christs Love… Oh wait, anyone cultish enough to follow ICP is certainly cult enough to follow Jesus.

So yeah, the point of this post is really just to show you guys this song called Thy Unveiling, which is the last track on their album the Wraith. It is the final Jokers Card which they had been putting off releasing for years because they said when it came out the world would end.  Clearly it didn’t but I actually went out and bought the album even though I hadn’t listened to ICP in years so in a way, my world sort of ended.  When I put the CD in my car I just started laughing when I heard Thy Unveiling.  If you thought the Miracles video was funny, just watch this until about the 3:20 mark.  It will make you piss your fucking pants.

Ps. I’m down with the clown till Im dead in the ground… or at least I was until I lost my virginity. Woop Woop.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iniW8RcYkbA[/youtube]

So Driven By Boredom has lost like 40% of it’s traffic since I went on “vacation”.  That is a pretty insane number.  I can get it back quickly I am sure, but I promise never to leave you that long again.  Starting tomorrow I will be uploading TONS of pictures of my trip.  It might be out of control.  I hope to post around 3 galleries a day until I run out of the thousands of pictures I have for you.  I will be posting some other fun stuff (aka n00dz) too because I want my site back to the way it was.  I am also going to be releasing a new print in my web store this week as well as possibly doing some minor tinkering to the site design.

I want to integrate my web store and my Tumblr into the site more and I might add a tiny ad section at the very bottom of the page if this deal goes through. I am pretty picky about ads which is why you don’t see any, but I have something very inobtrusive in the works that would at least pay some of the taxes I am going to owe soon. If you are intrested in advertising on this site, and have something in mind that won’t distract from the site, please let me know.

So, this week, help me get the site up and running again.  When you see something you like, let people know about it. Tweet, Tumbl, Stumble, blog, Digg, Buzz or whatever the kids are doing.  You could even email it or put it on Facebook! Wouldn’t that just make everyone sooo happy? It would make me happy at least.  Let’s do this!

Oh, and since I love you, have some oh-so-magical Happy Easter-time fun videos!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PP8avO4rlMQ[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2OC5Z1Fii8[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mLGzCtlRas[/youtube]

So I finally left Miami and got ditched twice on my way Orlando. I took a Greyhound bus all the way and met a high school photo student who I got to give sage advice to about photography.  I am probably not the best person to give advice, but she seemed excited about it and told me I was the most interesting person she had ever met.  That kinda made me cry a little bit and I told her to get the hell out of Florida. Hopefully one day she will take that advice if nothing else.

Anyway, on the content side of things, my friend sent me this video called Hipster Sharks and it totally name drops this site which I find hilarious.  The whole thing is pretty funny until it goes into a long tangent about Burning Angel and alt porn, but if you edited it down this thing could be a hit.  I need to make a reply video or something. I think I have a rhino puppet somewhere…

Lastly, I just wanted to tell you guys I am about to go to Disney World with my muse.  That should be awesome.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxWXd65hYts[/youtube]

So I am at SXSW and totally stressed out.  Today I missed a photo shoot with Steve James who is one of my favorite documentary filmmakers because of a daylight savings fuck up.  I was rushing to meet him when I got stuck in traffic and had to cancel.  It is slightly fortunate that I did because in my rush I forgot to pack my camera battery.  That would never happen in NYC, but of course it happens on the road.  I got dropped off to shoot the Film/Interactive trade show and realized I didn’t have a battery so I had to take a cab ride back to where I am staying and that is where I am now, my day almost totally wasted, updating my web site.

I told you I had a few tiny things to update while I was gone and this is the first of those.  This is a video Dan Baxter made for DJ Jess of Trash.  It just so happens that the day he filmed this was also the 9th annviersary party for Driven By Boredom.  So here is a pretty rad video of my anniversary party at Trash.  It is Not Safe For Work. Enjoy, hopefully I will be back with more soon.

PS. I put up a couple shots from yesterday on my Tumblr.