My old friend Colin is sick. A few months ago he found out he had a stage 4 inoperable brain tumor. That is not good. His only chance now is to fight it with chemo and hope for a miracle. Colin, despite not hiring me at Starbucks many years ago, is a rad fucking dude. I have spent a lot of weird and hilarious times with him. I think the last time I saw him I watched the election results come in with him and his girlfriend Christine. I do not want him to die. You do not want him to die. He needs help. He now has website that is documenting his treatment. The goal is both awareness and fund raising. Chemo is not cheap. Not being able to work because you are too week to stand up is not cheap. Colin is selling “Terminate The Tumor” bracelets in the style of the Livestrong bands. Now while Colin has never won the Tour De France, I also don’t think he has taken steroids before, and I have watched him put a cigarette out on his arm which seems just as impressive.

I bought a bracelet but I am as broke as I have ever been in my life and I live 6 hours away so I am not in any position to help him, but I can link his website and ask my friends and fans to buy a bracelet or donate some money or at the very least, retweet this post (click the button in the upper left hand corner of this post), link his site or just tell your friends about it. Anything you can do would mean a lot to me, to Colin and to all his family and friends.

And since half you people just come here to see boobs, maybe I can help you out too. Years ago Colin and my friend Raechel were in some weird scavenger hunt thing and it had a bonus round. The bonus round was to make a tape of just weird fucked up shit with extra points for nudity and violence. We happened to have found a wire grill cleaning brush that happened to make for great entertainment. If you wacked someone with it, not only did it hurt like hell but it instantly started bleeding in a very amusing pattern. We thought that hitting each other with this could garner some points… and even more points if Rae’s giant boobs were some how involved. I never got around to doing anything with the video, but when I heard about Colin I figured this was the perfect reason to get it up, and use the traffic it gained to help murder the bullshit growing in my man’s head.

So, watch this very Not Safe For Work video, and then visit Colin’s Brain Cancer Blog and send him some damn money you trust fund hipster fucks. Xo.

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