When I moved to NYC pretty much the first nightlife person I ever met was Susanne Bartsch.  The weekend before I moved to NYC I met a girl who worked for her who took me to a bunch of parties when I first moved to town including Happy Valley where Susanne was doing a party every Tuesday.  Since then I don’t think I have run into her again in the five years I have lived here until Tuesday night.

Susanne and my homie Kayvon Zand are doing this Tuesday night party at Le Bain at the Standard called On Top. Everyone keeps talking about it like it’s the best party in the city right now and it might be hard to argue against that. If you haven’t been to Le Bain you are clearly missing out. It has a hot tub on the dance floor and a huge roof deck with fake grass. With Kayvon and Susanne hosting at least 50% of the crowd is dressed up like it’s a costume party in Hell. Which is obviously an amazing thing.  Kayvon’s girlfriend Anna just hangs out topless with another topless friend in the hot tub all night and there are way too many super in shape gay dudes running around in unreasonably small swim suits.  And when I say way too many I mean that because they make me super selfconcious about being a fat old man and not that there are way too many gay dudes running around which brings me to this point:

Homophobes miss out on the best parties.

As I was leaving the party two dudes in Armani Exchange t-shirts walked up to the door to try to get into the party. It was clear that they were not going to get in but the bouncer pulled a move that I haven’t really seen before when rejecting bros from a party.  He was just like “Hey guys, it’s a gay party tonight.”  They looked disgusted and turned around at 90 MPH.  Those dudes might have been totally put off by all the naked guys in speedos running around and but they probably would have been psyched about the super hot girls everywhere and the naked girls in the fucking hot tub.  I feel bad for people who are scared to hang out with gay people cause gay people clearly throw the best fucking parties.

Anyway, that is the end of that rant.  You need to  fucking click right fucking here to see all the insane pictures from Susanne Bartsch’s On Top party at Le Bain at The Standard. And yeah, they are clearly NSFW.

This All My Friends Are In Bands series is getting a little out of hand I think.  My friends clearly are making way too many music videos or something.  It’s okay, I gotta do my best to let everyone know about them right?  One day if I ever finally do the redesign of this site I have been planning for years I can post one video at a time when it comes up, like I do on my Tumblr, but until then these bulk video updates are the solution.  So let’s see… Who do we have first?

Let’s start with the new Cerebral Ballzy video Drug Myself Dumb. They got a new video out where they all go to Vegas and take LSD. I haven’t actually talked to them about it but I am pretty fucking sure they are actually on Acid for most of the video. It’s a pretty good concept for a video and a fucking great song if you are into good punk rock, which I of course am.  Also I should mention that yesterday I had a small role (one line) in my friends HBO TV show called Girls that will be out in January and I was wearing my Ballzy Shirt on the show.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2FbENveaRvM&feature=player_embedded[/youtube]

Speaking of drugs, if you follow my Tumblr you have seen several photos I posted of my dude Ease DaMan smoking meth out of a light bulb. I tried meth about ten years ago when it was called “Crystal” and it was a cheap club drug and no one was thinking about faces of meth.  I thought it was pretty boring and not scary at all.  Ease wanted to dispel some scary meth myths and one night he hit me up to take photos of him doing it. He smoked over $200 worth of meth and I took pictures. He came to the same conclusion I did. It’s fucking boring.  What is not boring is jumping out of a plane. Ease jumped out of a plane and turned the footage of it into a video for his song We Do Drugs of his “Average Size Penis” mix tape.

Next up we have a video directed by my friend Phillippe Grenade. It’s by a band called Silent Rider and the song is called I Was A Bomb.  I don’t really love the music and I can’t say much about that side of it, but the video is fucking beautiful and really really creepy, not unlike Phillippe himself. And be warned if you click that last link, it is pretty NSFW.  The video is just mildly NSFW and you will undoubtedly enjoy it.

And lastly we have for you the new Ninjasonik video featuring my dude Mr. Starcity. The track is called Bloodymary and you should probably just watch it. The beat is pretty minimalistic and it features my friend Lena as a dominatrix. It’s pretty nuts. I gotta go to band practice now so one day I can make a video so I am gonna get the fuck out of here. I’m done talking watch the fucking video.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSkh_Wukjm0[/youtube]

Nearly a decade ago Driven By Boredom was one of the first advertisers for Suicide Girls. I ended up introducing Suicide Girls to a bunch of big webmasters and helped spread the word of naked tattooed girls long before anyone knew what “alt porn” was. In exchange for that early loyalty SG gave me a life time account which I have to this day. In 2002 I started talking to this Suicide Girl named Flux. We would talk online all the time and eventually we started talking on the phone and became very close. But she eventually got a boyfriend and moved across the country and I didn’t even get to meet her.  That is until 2007 when she came to NYC and we got to hang out and we walked all over the city and it was lovely.  I took some photos of her naked in her hotel room which looking back on are pretty awful. Still it was a lovely day.

Years passed and we still kept in touch and finally she came to visit NYC again under some pretty unfortunate circumstances. One of her friends died and she went to the memorial service near Coney Island.  She stayed with me and we hung out the whole time but she lost her wallet and was pretty bummed about her friend so we never really found a good time to take photos. The last night she was in town I was totally freaked out that I wasn’t going to get to shoot her so we took some random photos of her in my bed and then some shots of her doing hand stand push ups and crazy shit like that.  She is really into Cross Fit and wanted to show off some bad ass feats of strength.  All the photos I took were shot on 35mm.  The color ones on my little point and shoot Yashica T4 and the black and white ones were shot on my mom’s old Pentax that I learned to take photos on.

I didn’t really have plans to publish these except for a few here and there on my Tumblr. But I made a “Flux” folder on my desktop so I could send her all the photos I took and there they sat. I recently was looking at them and I realized that I could make a little mini set out of the photos like I did when I shot Zoe Voss on 35mm in LA.

So anyway, long story short. Flux rules. I miss her. And if you want to see way better and way more naked photos of her you should check her out over at Suicide Girls. But before you do that, click here to see all the NSFW 35mm shots I took of Flux Suicide when she came to visit NYC a few weeks ago.

PS. These are the first nude photos she has taken in several years. #WINNING

As much as I hate Friday and Saturday nights in Manthattan this recent Friday night there was a lot of stuff I wanted to check out.  Usually when there is too much to do in one night I just do none of it, text a girl or two and then end up watching Netflix till 8am. But this Friday night I decided to put on some pants and head into the city and try to do it all…

Step one: I headed to Fontana’s for The Dish & The Spoon after party. The Dish and the Spoon is a movie that I wanted to see at SXSW but ended up missing.  Since then, the star of the movie Greta Gerwig, started dating one of my best friends and has become a friend so I wanted to see the film even more when it had a Rooftop Films screening on Friday. Unfortunately I couldn’t quite make it in time so I just hit the after party.  Everyone was leaving by the time I got there but I got pictures of Greta and director Alison Bagnall and a bunch of other people who no doubt loved the movie so much they had to party about it.

After that I met up with my friend Keith and the two of us headed over to Beauty Bar which is usually fucking horrible on the weekends but tonight former Smith’s bassist Andy Rourke was DJing and I love that dude so I had to stop by.  Beauty Bar clearly realizes they have a ton of douche bags in there on the weekend and now has a weekend dress code which would be great except it meant I couldn’t wear my hat inside which annoyed the shit out of me so after I said hello to Andy and his hetro lifemate Ole and took a few pictures, Keith and I made a break for Webster Hall.

DJ Jess got on my case on Thursday night about how I needed to check out Peaches’ back up dancers who were going to be performing at Trash downstairs in the Studio.  They did not dissapoint. All sorts of madness was going on down in the Studio when I got there and I took the best photos of the night.  Keith on the other hand was sort of just looking at me like “what the fuck?” so we went upstairs to check out the Girls & Boys party.

Modeselektor was DJing and people seemed to be really fucking excited about this.  The kids in the crowd were going nuts. All dance music sounds the same to me so I will just assume they were playing “Techno” and leave it at that.  I just mostly hung out on stage and talked to Nicky Digital while Keith was getting drunk and then we decided to make our last stop of the night over in Alphabet City.

We walked over to White Noise on Ave B for the Wild Ones party. Usually that place is packed for Michael T and Sam Valentine but it was a little dead tonight. I will just assume that a Motley Crue cover band was playing somewhere and that’s where everyone was.  Keith bounced early and I had a super awkward run in with a former friend and ended my night listening to a conversation about Harry Potter tattoos. I decided I had had enough and ran full speed to a cab and went the fuck home.

All in all it was actually a pretty fun night despite my complaints.  Maybe we can do it again next week… or maybe I’ll just stay home and rewatch the Godfather Trilogy.  Whatever works…

Click here to see all the pictures from my bar crawl of sorts last Friday night.

I got a quick update for you. It is the weekend after all and I can’t be bringing you pure awesomeness while you guys are too busy enjoying your summer fun times, etc.  So I have some pictures from the NC-17 party at Lit on Thursday. DJ Jess and Bastard do downstairs and DJ Fancy is upstairs.  Good times are had, etc, etc, etc.

I used to shoot NC-17 all the time but since I am a cranky old man now I only shoot parties I get paid to shoot. So NC-17 is usually off the table.  However, as I mentioned before, I am being interviewed for a mini documentary thing over on New York Lives and they needed some B-Roll footage of me shooting party photos and I knew they would be fine with me filming whatever at Lit.

So yeah, a lot of these photos suck cause I was trying to make taking the photos look better than the actual photos. But there are probably a few fun shots in here anyway. Kayvon Zand and is crew showed up, plus there are some half naked girls dancing about so you can’t complain too much. I’ll shut up now.

Just click here to look at all the photos from NC-17 on Thursday at Lit Lounge.

When I first started doing this nightlife photo blog bullshit I shot a lot of girls naked in bathrooms. It was fun and I wasn’t taking any of this too seriously. But as I started making a living doing this a few things changed. The first was that when I would try to shoot girls who took being a nude model more seriously I would always hear “I don’t wanna be some drunk girl in a bathroom.” I also got an unfair reputation for taking advantage of drunk girls or some bullshit like that even though every girl I shot in a bathroom I made sure that they were fine with the pictures sober and I always took photos down if they ever changed their mind.  But either way that reputation was not something I wanted and when I started giving a fuck what my photos looked like I quickly realized that bathrooms are not the ideal location for a photo shoot. The lighting sucks and you have an extremely limited time to shoot in there.  So I pretty much stopped shooting girls in bathrooms.

Well, for whatever reason that has changed recently and I am kinda glad it has because even though the photos usually suck it’s a lot of fun.  And just seeing the looks on peoples faces when I come out of a bathroom with a hot girl with a camera in my hand is pretty hilarious.  When I was on tour with Prince Terry & Dances we stopped in Cleveland and I shot Haley Ann in a bathroom there. The club was closed but it seemed like the best spot to shoot anyway. So why not?

A couple weeks later some Chicago Burning Angels came to town.  I was hanging out with them and a few other people at the metal bar Duff’s in Williamsburg.  I did a shoot there years ago and I loved the bathroom so I suggested we shoot in there. I had already done a great naked in public shoot with Veruca James but I hadn’t shot her friend Azure Maddox yet and I figured this was the place.  We snuck into the bathroom and did a mini photo shoot. I was going to put it up earlier in the week but things kept coming up so I waited until today.

Meanwhile, while I was waiting to put up Azure’s set I got a text from my friend Whitney.  I met her ages ago and she hated me but then she started following me on Twitter and realized that I am fucking amazing so we became friends. I have been trying to shoot her for ages but she kept flaking on me so when she texted me saying she was drunk and at Max Fish, had six boxes of nitrous oxide cartridges on her and wanted me to take photos of her half naked in a bathroom doing nitrous I got in a fucking cab and got down there.

She didn’t want her nipples online for whatever reason so she covered them during  the shoot but it looked sort of awkward so she ended up putting her bra on. I think she did like 4 or 5 balloons of nitrous while she people were banging on the door trying to piss or do coke or whatever people use bathrooms for.  I thought it was pretty funny but she was drunk and high and the photos kinda sucked so I wasn’t even going to post them until she told me she thought they were hilarious and demanded I put them up.  I cannot argue with that logic so here they are.

Despite Whitney mostly covering her boobs both of these sets are clearly NSFW.  You have been warned.

Click here to see the naked bathroom gallery of Azure Maddox at Duff’s.

And click here to see the almost naked bathroom gallery of Whitney “Whip-it” at Max Fish.

So you saw all the pictures from the Brooklyn Zombie Crawl I posted yesterday, and now you get to see the madness that was the after party at Public Assembly.  The second half of these pictures are pretty bad because I got really really drunk.  It was my birthday and at some point I had about 7 shots in 20 minutes and I pretty much lost it after that. I woke up with a ton of bruises all over my right leg, a cut ankle and several bite marks. I have no idea how any of that happened but I am going to assume at least some of it had something to do with crowd surfing during the Misfits cover band Ghouls Night Out.

The whole thing was insane with blood wrestling, zombie comedians, a NSFW zombie beauty pageant and a much more NSFW edition of Doug Sakmann’s Strip For Pain (thanks to Sammi Sprinkles) and lots of PBR. But honestly as retarded as I was it’s probably best to just check out the NYC Zombie Crawl site for more info.

Let’s just get to it. Click here for the insane Brooklyn Zombie Crawl after party pictures from Public Assembly.