Okay. Let’s start by staying happy 4th of July. When I think of the 4th I think about going to the beach with my family and setting off hundreds of dollars worth of free fireworks every year. My dad used to loan one of the maintenance guys at his law office a few thousand dollars every year and he would open a firework stand and sell fireworks for a few weeks. He would always pay my dad back with fireworks as interest. So every year we would always have the sickest, most dangerous fireworks. My friend Marshall and I used to take them apart and make bombs out of them. About a year ago, my parents turned my old bed room into a guest room and they made me clean out the room. When I was going through all my stuff I found one of the bombs we made. It is huge, and I think I am going to set it on fire today and see what happens. It is at least 12 years old, probably older. It will either do nothing, or blow up in my face. There is not really a fuse and I remember putting gun powder in it. Yikes.

My second point of order is that it is my dog Freedom’s 17th birthday today. This is a completely unreasonable thing. My dog has been deaf and mostly blind for several years. He can barely move. He can’t walk up stairs and he can no longer run. That being said, he never seems like he is in pain, and is always happy to see me when I visit my parents, so I am very glad he is still hanging in there. I got him in the 5th grade and I could not have been happier to have a dog. I wanted a big dog, or a pug… but my parents wanted to get a Westie.. they won. I wanted to get the biggest one of the puppies, but my brother wanted the smallest… he won. Still, I was just ecstatic to have a puppy. I had him sitting on my chest when I was resting on the ground. He jumped for possibly the first time in his life and it was about the cutest thing I had ever seen. I almost vomited cupcakes.

Anyway, if he just makes it one more year, I can probably sleep with a girl who is younger than my dog, and I think that will be a feat worth mentioning.

Anyway, happy 4th, I hope you have fun. I will be busy blowing up bombs and watching people devour hot dogs for sport.

Enjoy this video of America’s Greatest Hero: Joey Chestnut… See you at Nathan’s

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzBIH8Frq-8[/youtube]

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